Played

Doug Winter, Paul Rushforth, Ben Mitchell, Chris Territt, +Jason Leitch, Nick Hughes, *Adrian Lightly, Rich Cresswell, Jeremy Robinson, Cliff Harrop, Jeff Thompson

Report

And so to Barnes. Named after the oil baron in 'Dallas' (are you sure?- 80s TV Ed.), it served as the highly picturesque setting for the first GRACC match of the 2006 season, against the splendidly monikered St. Anne's AllStars. Being the weekend that Australia played Brazil in Germany (hard luck, our Aussie chaps!) and also some-time GRACC member James Havelock's stag event, it took some last-minute phone calls and advanced traffic avoidance techniques on the South Circular to field the required eleven players for a slightly-later-than-planned 2.00pm start.

Somewhat surprisingly, Captain de'Lightly (a) won the toss and (b) on potentially the hottest day of the year so far, elected to field. To a smattering of polite applause, the AllStars openers strode to the wicket, looking purposeful (and quite tall). As ever, Nick opened the bowling and kept it nice and tidy, limiting them to the odd boundary into the nettles. Unfortunately, Adrian was having a mare with the (white!) ball coming in from the Railway End and went for far too many, consistently overpitching outside off stump. St Anne's soon ticked on to 80-odd without loss, before Nick got the breakthrough with one that reared up at their No.2, who promptly dollied it to the skipper at midwicket. The other opener, however, was looking very comfortable and picked off the bad balls with monotonous regularity, generally straight into the surrounding undergrowth (so it was soon agreed that we would knock five overs off each innings to make up for having to find the ball every time it crossed the boundary).

Back in the middle, Ben and Chris were now thrown into the bowling attack and there was some genuine turn for Chris who was very unlucky with a couple that spun right back over the bails. Paul very nearly took a horizontal flying catch to his left but their No.1 batsman looked in very little trouble and was soon being applauded from the sidelines on reaching a very stylish fifty. Another bowling change brought success, however, with Rich taking the Brambles End and tempting their lanky No.3 outside off; Jason taking a tidy catch behind the stumps. Two down, but with the score advancing past 150 it was time to bring on Jeremy's left-arm seamers. Immediately, he forced the batsmen into some false drives and then lured their No.4 into an almighty heave down the ground which was somehow taken by Cliff in his flip-flops, under pressure from two members of his own side (great calling, guys). After some good late-innings hitting, their opener reached a deserved century (103*) and St Anne's AllStars finished with a sizeable 216-3 off their 30 overs. After a well-earned tea (including proper Gentleman's Relish sandwiches as well as some rather good Yorkshire puddings) it was the turn of GRACC to take a deep breath and attempt to chase down over two hundred runs - more runs than we managed in the whole of last season put together...

Some late tinkering with the batting order saw Nick and Rich pad up and head out to face the St Anne's opening bowlers. Immediately, Rich set out his stall with some well-timed drives straight down the ground (and into the nettles again). The bowlers seemed unnerved and were sending down some tasty half-volleys which were duly despatched by both batsmen. Rattling along at ten an over, the excitement was mounting on the sidelines as a couple of huge sixes quickly saw Rich to his fifty and the score to 82 without loss. St Anne's then brought on their best bowler (the centurion opener, not surprisingly) who was a much more dangerous prospect and in his first over he forced Nick to play on for a decent 32. Still, this was an unusually solid start so Cliff was sent in to make his GRACC debut at No.3 (after we had found him some boots). Playing with a joie-de-vivre more suited to the beaches of the Caribbean, Cliff was an excellent foil for Rich and they continued the good work, keeping the bowlers at bay with Rich fluently carving the bad balls to the rope and Cliff remaining solid at the other end. Unfortunately, it was not to be a game of two centuries as Rich was caught behind trying to hook a bouncer, having made an impressive 81. In went Ben to steady the ship but he was unfortunately out cheaply; Paul's 'unorthodox technique' surprised the bowlers for a while until he too missed a straight one and suddenly GRACC required exactly a run a ball off the last eight overs. Some patient batting from Jeremy allowed Cliff to keep the score ticking over until they were both out in quick succession, trying to accelerate the run-rate. With Chris coming in to work it around tidily, it finally fell to skipper Adrian to hit the winning boundary with one over to spare, to joyous (and slightly unhinged) celebrations from the watching Relishers.

Many thanks to St. Annes for a splendid match, all those who participated (especially at such short notice) as well as Clan Winter et al for the boundary support. Whilst winning is of course pleasant, I trust that GRACC will continue to be the haven for underachieving gentleman cricketers that we have all come to know and love - up the Relishers!!

Result

St. Anne's AllStars: 216 for 3 (30.0 overs)

GRACC: 220 for 5 (29.1 overs)

GRACC won by 5 wickets

Man of the Match: Rich Cresswell

Champagne Moment: Cliff advancing down the wicket whilst maniacally grinning at their fastest bowler

Comedy Moment: The 'Keystone Cops' catch whilst under a pile of GRACC players - Cliffy again.